Episode 2: How to Keep Astrology from Happening TO You

Freaked out by all this talk of Pluto in Aquarius, Saturn returns, and ye olde thrice-yearly Mercury retrograde? Here's a quick guide on how to keep astrology from happening TO you (and why it makes such a difference).

Transcript

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Good morning and welcome to another episode of Mindful Necromancy, where I don't have a good intro yet where I talk about astrology and the psyche and taking control back over your life. I don't know. I'm working on it, dog, and really fighting the urge to stop and repeat this part of the recording over and over, but that's just what's gonna come out. So um that being said, that's what we do here is get really raw and not polished. So without further ado on that front, I wanted to press record finally and talk about something that rattles around my mind all the time, which is why it is so beneficial. I wanted to say important, but like that's up to you, dude. Like, but why it is so beneficial, and sure I'll say important to work with the planets and their archetypal energies. Or depending on what kind of astrology you practice, like just their energies. Like, take your pick, dude. Why it's so important to work with their energies rather than ignoring them, because if you do not work with the planets, they will happen to you. They will happen to you, my guy. I think about this all the time. Um if we think about the planets again, it take your pick of astrological epistemology. Um in any version, the planets represent different aspects of our life, our psyche. Um, they're the the actors on the stage. They're the actors on the stage of our minds, of our relationships, of our societies. For example, um, you know, Mars is the assertive, aggressive, action-oriented, you could call it drive or urge. When I wake up in the morning and decide to get out of bed instead of just lying there herkle dirkling, as my daughter would, my daughter like found about the Scottish term for just like lying in bed after waking up called Herkelderkeling, and so we talk about it all the time. There's a little definition for you. That is the martial urge to get out of bed and be like, okay, I'm gonna do the thing now. So that is like a super, super like non, well, for some of us, dramatic example. For my daughter right now, who's 13, a very dramatic example, like really having to muster all of her martial energy. Uh, but you know, for for a lot of people, unless you're in the depths of depression, getting out of bed in the morning and doesn't seem too striking. We tend to think of Mars as like, you know, the warrior or the athlete or you know, things like that. But um either way, there is uh an action in the world, a drive, an urge, a phenomenon. Like there's so many different cool ways that you could look at this, and they're frankly all accurate. So let's not split hairs. Um, or split hairs, go off. I don't care. All of the planets represent different aspects of life in this way. It's important to define this way of looking at and perceiving the planets before we continue. And so when I when I am um, you know, looking at the upcoming transits or like listening to uh you know another astrologer's horoscope for the month or the week or what have you, um, I, you know, I often I'm a couples therapist, and so I will often see things like Mars and Mercury squares or oppositions uh or even conjunctions and be like, oh, oh, this is gonna be an interesting week at work. And what I'm clocking in that moment is that um, you know, as I become aware of the fact that these two energies, Mercury, you know, the the communicator and Mars, the uh, you know, the aggressor, let's just say, in this instance, of course, the first thing that I come to think of is uh fighting words. Them fighting words. And so I really like to think about uh this sort of these two case studies I want to share. They're not specific to any clients. That would be super illegal and unethical. They're things that happen all the time to everyone, all of us. Whenever I see a transit like this coming up, I'm like, oh my god, okay, like Mars Mercury conjunction on Friday, whoop-dee-doo. I always think to myself, oh my god, I'm going to get into a fight with my husband. I don't want that, dude. I love when things are simpatico and easy and great. Like, I don't want that to happen. Very often, the the warning is sort of like, hey guys, watch out. Mars and Mercury are going to form a conjunction, so it'll be really easy to, you know, pop off if you're not kind of being mindful and intentional about the way that you're saying things. You know, if if there is a conflict, which life is filled with friction and conflicts, if there is a conflict you need to address, just be really mindful that it's going to be really easy to accidentally step into the um the tidal pull of this energy. What's that word that I'm looking for? When you get swept out into the current, a riptide. It's gonna be really easy to get swept in up into the riptide of this conjunction. So just be really mindful. And when you do that, oh my god, whether there's a fight or not, it goes great. So what I've noticed is that when I when I see a transit like this coming up, I'm like, oh my god, oh my god, like I'm gonna get into a fight with my husband. And you know what? I was aware that this energy was coming. So if that Friday comes and some kind of friction comes up and we surf through it, and my husband and I have a great day. Or there is no conflict in our relationship, there is no underlying, like, you know, buckling of wills or uh viewpoints underneath the surface. Um, you know, there's no moments of stubbing toes or dysregulation or you know, hanger that get in the way. And I'm like, wow, you know, this is actually great. I don't know where that Mars Mercury is gonna show up. And without fail, without fail, my dudes, it shows up in the therapy room. And it often shows up in a case, always shows up in couples' cases for me. It always shows up in a case where um one or both of the individuals have not yet learned how to uh like really surf the urge and harness the power of um, you know, positive, assertive, healthy, clear communication in conflict. You know, there's like a saying, um, words, not behaviors, that I learned um in like group processing work, which is when like you have it's like a type of group therapy and you guys kind of process what's happening. And so, you know, the example is like a guy gets like really, really mad, but instead of saying he's angry, like his his body language changes. He gets like really, you can feel the huffiness stirring up, and he gets kind of red in the face and he crosses his arms and leans back and and just is, and you can feel it pouring off of him, this like huffy hostility that because he hasn't talked about it, um it's hard to kind of name, but it's this truly like like incredibly powerful force. Oh my God, like we're incredible magician work, right? Um and yet what happens is he's so mad about whatever just transpired in the room, and it's it's tricky for the other clients in the therapy room to like talk about it. They're not like, hey, you seem kind of pissed over that. I mean, that's that's the actually that is the goal. That's what as the facilitator or as one of the participants you would encourage is saying, hey, I'm noticing your body language shift. You seem, you know, maybe kind of upset or or angry. Um, do you care to tell us what's going on? And so words, not behaviors, is can you say with words, yeah, I'm really angry right now about what Donna just said. And here's why. That is much more effective, and people can actually work with that and communicate together, Mercury, to um collaborate and and and and soothe and co-regulate and whatever the goal might be. So I always see this pop off in my couples sessions. And so um, on the one hand, that's great for me because it means things are not stressful in my home life. But at the same time, it's like I know, okay, so this this shows that this is an area in my work with this particular couple that we want to work on. And of course, I don't always use these terms because, you know, I don't always practice astrology directly in my psychotherapy. Um, but it means that we need to work on uh communicating this type of uh hostility, aggression, anger, frustration, whatever, whatever the martial thing is. Now, the other thing that always happens, which is really funny, I say always, the other thing that tends to happen is that I lose track of the upcoming transits. You know, I have a really busy week, or I'm just not paying super good attention, or I get caught up in something and I forget, oh, right, right, right, right. There's gonna be a Mars Mercury Square on Friday. Clock that. And let me tell you, that's when I find myself popping off and my husband. And it's like the planet here is hitting me in the back of the head with a two by four, being like, get it the fuck together. You are not aware, you have forgotten about me, you have forgotten about my influence in your life, you have forgotten that you can work with me, and now I'm going to happen to you to try and wake you back up to try and wake you back up, not only to my presence in your life, but also to the gifts that I have to offer, and how if you will just ask and work with me a little bit, you too can have that. And um, you know, at the risk of sounding like a preacher on a Sunday with like exhortations, like we all do this, we all forget. We all have times where we're just so busy, you know, we can't help it. It's like a string of dynamite just like blowing up, and you're like, well, this wasn't my week. There was just too much. Like, that's okay. It's all okay. Um, the point is not to beat yourself up over it, the point is just to continuously practice returning, like with mindfulness, returning your awareness and your focus back to the breath. But in this case, turning your focus back to the planet and its power in your life and turning, not even that, turning your power, huh, Freudian slip got ahead of myself, turning your awareness back to where you have power. Power with, not power over, not power over a planet. Oh yeah, and enjoy having power over a planetary energy. That's funny. Power with it. So I wanted to share these couple case studies, if you will. And um just to illustrate what this how this can tend to look in your life, I'm sure you can, if you pause this episode, think back to a time that you were in a situation like one of the ones I described before. So the invitation here from life, from the cosmos, from the divine, from your innermost self. I love all the frameworks, they're all great. So take which ones you want to use. The invitation here is to sit back down in the driver's seat, maybe for the first time, but to even visualize this. Visualize getting into the driver's seat. Where you are in control of the steering, of the gas, of the brakes, and most importantly of all, what direction you're going in. All of these different aspects of driving could be given their own entire podcast episodes. But just getting into the driver's seat where you are the one consciously determining how these how the planets are going to show up in your life. Because they're gonna show up. Saturn is gonna show up with that brake pedal, and confusion about where to go is gonna show up. That's just part of life. Once you stop arguing that that shouldn't be there, then you might then you might begin your journey. Then you might start to get somewhere. But instead of arguing with them, figure out how you can work with them. To figure out how much to press on the break, where you want to go, when to accelerate into the turn. This applies to the planets in your natal chart, where they are, how they're aspected to each other. Where they are in where they're dignified or where they're in detriment, you know, where they tend to struggle. There's really beautiful stuff. Like when you learn to work with those energies, it's like chef's kiss, dude. Um, and obviously it works with transiting planets. Oh my god. Like, I I love God, that's what makes it so alive, is like transiting astrology. I get so sick of like the you know, pop psychology, like, this is what means if you have Mars in your 10th house, and like it's just so okay, and like it's so it's so dead and static. And to be fair, good nasal astrology is not like that. This is like shitty pops pop astrology that I'm talking about. But people have a tendency to look at it that way. And so that's if you're if you're not familiar with deeper or more kind of alive forms of astrology, and so that's what I'm talking about. That's who I'm talking to for for people who are like, okay, I've looked up what Mars in my tenth house means a thousand times, but what do I do with it? This this is for you. This podcast is for you. So don't feel ashamed that you haven't gotten further than that. There's so much stuff out there on the internet. Um, but I want to tell you that there's there's more aliveness for this, for you in this. So transiting astrology, um, sinistry. Sinistry is, you know, looking at the way two charts uh, you know, in usually in in relationship, always in a relationship, it's always a relationship of something to something. But typically people use that with like, you know, love and and relationship astrology. Um, looking how looking at how, you know, if your partner's moon squares your squares your Venus, like what does that how can you channel that energy to turn it into something a growth area in your relationship? A square can a square creates a lot of friction, but that friction always creates growth rather than just like a dead end stop. But it feels like a terrible fucking dead end stop if you don't know how to channel it and harness it. And those are the the fights that will like seemingly pop up out of nowhere, or like you just can never find a resolution. It's one of those unresolved, unresolvable, you know, problems in the relationship that that the Gottmans like to talk about. So I'm looking forward to doing a lot of cross-pollination between my psychology work, I should say, relational psychotherapy work, and astrology. But anyway, that's I digress. So when you look at the planets as when you look at the planets and their energies and their transits and their movement as an invitation to get into the driver's seat of your life and learn or conquer or uh surf or whatever verb you want to use here, whichever one is planetarily appropriate. When you look at it as an opportunity, an invitation to step into the driver's seat and work with the planetary energy, work with the planet, every single thing in your life becomes an opportunity. It becomes an opportunity to learn something new, to practice a skill, to learn that there's a place where you maybe need some skills. It becomes an opportunity to unfold your life, get rid of old conditioning, imagine new possibilities and scenarios, best of all, go put those newly envisioned alternatives into action because that's the ritual that makes change. And I am not gonna go on a digression diatribe on the state of our current world, not just limited to the United States. Usually I like to speak from a place that I can, you know, I have some, you know, I can I'm qualified to speak on, but I think I can safely say that everything is gone, is just fucked to death right now. And that is part of the planetary vibes. And um to examine astrology and use it, use the planets, use the transits, use what you have in your own life, in your own natal chart, and in relation to your partner, to your children, to your friends, to your boss, to your your community, to use these energies as an opportunity to step into the driver's seat, then you might be able to make some change. Not the whole, yeah, I'm gonna like be upset about something, but then like consciously or unconsciously hope that someone else is going to come in and make the change. No, no, no. That's when the planet's gonna keep spanking you with that two by four. But you can actually find a way to make the change. And it doesn't need to be grand. Very often, it is very small, it is in these tiny, um, tiny, subtle layers, you know, like paper mache, that gradually become greater and greater and greater acts. And of course, always, always, always, you know, a tiny change. It's the whole, you know, drop, drop in the water, um, ripples out and then becomes very vast waves, butterfly effect or whatever. Those small paper mache layers of just developing the awareness, watching it hit you in the back of the head like four or five times before you figure out how to put that small change into action, that does eventually just build and build and build until it becomes something much, much greater. You know, object in motion stays in motion. God, what is that word? I'm like totally blanking because I need to wrap this up and go to the office. But um, yeah, I know, I know you guys know the word. So that is uh what I wanted to hop on here and share. Maybe someday I will have a nice intro and outro like phrase or you know, music or a clip or something, but I don't right now because this is my paper mache on going out and sharing all of this that's just rattling around in my head right now. So I like you will continue to answer the invitation and as importantly as becoming aware is continue to take that conscious action. So, um, in sum, I invite you to find one area of life today. And you can go look at the transiting planets if you want to, or if you don't know what that means, or like what you would be staring at, then don't worry about it. But find one area where something surprises you, or uh you find it mildly unpleasant, or actually, if you find it pleasant, let's say you receive good news, go and examine that experience as though it is asking you to step into the driver's seat. Maybe wants more of that, less of that, doesn't know what to do with that. Just see how it's asking you to show up there. And with that, I will wrap up this recording and see you. Hear you? You'll hear me, I guess, next time.